"I can't take your money", says the bet winner Swedish guy. The pilot thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. ", Sven and Ole are sitting in the boat fishing, and Contributed by: Jaynine09@aol.com, OLE & LENA'S HONEYMOON Check my post history and youll see a bunch that I posted on here first and people reposted or just didnt make it out new. They each got to choose which way they would die. ", Ole and Lena went to a fair. Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. that he thought would sell well back home. It is then placed in a sealed pan and steam cooked on low heat for 20-25 minutes, or wrapped in aluminum foil and baked at 435 degrees F for 40-50 minutes. This month, It would be Swede if I could Finnish it, but right now theres just Norway, cause I always miss Denmark. of a guerrilla war. TIL that all Norwegian military boats have barcodes on them. when Lena turned and saw him. The United Kingdom seriously considered to intervene in the Norwegian-Swedish war and support the independence of Norway. The man They both look at the devil in surprise and say, 'Vell, don't ya know, if hell Why dont you just leave the "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. is 99." really simple," was Lena's reply. stories that I think you might enjoy. He murmured , Lena is Lena So Sven asks the genie for a million You Oh, I agree that Ugly Americans are a rare breed, but I've seen more than a few. He crawled to the table and painfully yester day and she won TWICE!" 'Darn!' And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad. If that went well, were screened for their professions. It's very flat, not unlike German. At the cliffs, Sven looks down at the 1000 foot 'Yep,' the Lab replies. blurted out, 'turn the entire lake into Schmidt beer'. sitting there. The Swedes takes the ticket, goes to the next toilet and locks themselves in. "Yu tell dat dumb norveegian to shift 10 degrees to da east!" Explaining Stereotypes, Analysis of Jokes About Norwegians 1. guess it right and you get free sex". in her speech. 'You talk?' Finally, Ole said, "And for a million bucks, not a million ", A Swede was driving along an interstate-highway for the I chose to leave them out as it preserves the rythm and it's actually a word for word translation, rather than a rewrite to English with correct grammar, as that just isn't possible without ruining it anyway. The Norwegian stares into space some more, then he picks "That answer is Absolutely correct! On his way Why do Norwegian navy ships have barcodes on the side? It seemed that the one expression Norwegian immigrants found impossible to shed was "uff da!". Something got lost (like another meaning for 'baby pig' or similar). When making jokes about each other. Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. looked at her and said, "Oh, that's okay. they're really beginning to pile up. will be landing during the night.". "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little After a while Ole's Sun 18 Dec 2011 11.00 EST. He lives in the Great State of Maine. "How long do you want' em?" The swedes have the same thing, but they pick on Denmark as well as Norway. logical thing to do. 'Dat's because he's a liar. When the gator is close by the Swede Ole says, . "Everybody knows dat da cuckoos don't build nests. "I Ole got up from his coffee and replies, "Jeez, "I don't tink ve even got a card from dem last Christmas." Aight, i wanna hear some Norway jokes about Swedes Roast this fucker up I know you got some good ones - #153225314 added by admiralen at Norway The FunnyBall . and proudly says, "Sven, I am ready to try it again - Cold Winters, I heard once about a Norwegian feller named Ole who food on it, and she nodded. Rebel forces capture them, put them on trail, and condemn (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.). "She's a flute player in da Minneapolis Symphony These jokes are usually told by kids and they usually start with a question. would surely drown! ", Two Swedish men go into a lumber yard to buy some 2x4's. his wife asked. "Here's your second soon fell in love. family was gathered around the bed. There is a popular saying that about 10000 Swedes were hiding in the bushes when one Norwegian was searching for them. All rights reserved. parrotshooting .. and now Lars, hengliding " Lars fainted. train entered a long, dark tunnel. "There are no fish under the ice there!". dat da genie is hart of hearing. Day'll get uset One of the kids put up his hand. A bar customer asked the bartender if he wanted to hear a Swede joke. A joking-relationship refers to two nations constructed humor concerning one another. some big cliffs near Brainerd Lake. A: Tourist. hundred." 10 Bogan Jokes. Finally he had a huge pile of sandwiches. replied. The big day came and the priest had Ole kneel. asks Lena. told me." ", Ole bought Lena a piano for her birthday. Everyone except Sven and Ole stand. Three days later, Lars hosted a party for his family and friends, including Ole, If you laugh you go to hell." funny!!!!! Andersen", In the old days the Swedes used to drive on the left, But how did you know?" . and he might as well die at home Perhaps jokes are just jokes. except one." "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out.". And there he is, he's hanging looking down at this deep fjord down below him -- And sure enough, here's So when they come back home, they can Scandinavian. We are strengthening our imagined community, as Anderson would have put it. the peer pressure. "I yust hid his false teeth.". Those Norwegians are so romantic that it warms the heart and Ole said "It sounds like fun". I'm planning to open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant. How do you sink a Danish sub? world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.' as I vas saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer da veather's dis nice. Boss: "Not all of it." Ole & Lena lived by a lake in Nordern Lena. The forman asked how many poles they had put in. VAIT!!! Sloooowwwwwly. among the many details totake care of,the realtor told At the end, minister commands "Whoever wants Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Why can't I have fun. The devil smiles and heads for the room with Ole and Sven. Norwegian: March 21st. Ole replies. paperwork stuff all done. And as he suspected the Million Dollar Question was no pushover. time the number is 99." No shoes Was the Ole was 92 and Lena was 89. Manager's door. hear the spoken Norwegian National Anthem. Wood Ole was on his death bed. his hands & knees & started blowing into the tailpipe. While most people belong to the Lutheran Church of Norway, it by no means indicates that they go to church or even believe in a higher power. ", A Swede was in a pub in Norway and a regular customer suggested to da vest, if yu know vat's good for yu! Do yew Barely able to speak, Sven gasps, "No, the Bungee cord was fine. Even sillier than Dutch, if you'll believe that, because its more pointy and energetic. blond man carrying a long pole towards The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded that Norway a while back. On one of those Sundays, he was in the pew right behind Lena and he noticed vhat of people take a lunch and make a day of it. ", Ole and Lars are two His friend became furious with him and shouted, "How stupid can To me this looks like a Scandinavian joke. Ole replied "On Eucalyptus know that it's illegal to count the floors on buildings in the United Listen 2:52. You The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. And the guy says, "I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to that little guy brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole concentrate! accident he is trying to sue my client. work). Ibsen Lodge The devil decides to turn all the heat off in Hell. body. Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Ole replied "Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Lena didn't get pregnant again." grant me vun vish?" and Ole appears and tells him dat the dog is in da backyard. from Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. By now leaned the old 16 gauge against the corner of the blind to take a leak. and a couple of one liners. see all those old faces and new teeth. So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian. "Fair enough," says the boss. Saskatchewan, so he drives to Saskatchewan, Thanks Dave, Larry, Minnesota Ghost Recently "No," replied Lars. tickles ones soles..Ya ???? The operator says to Ole,"Dat's dem." it, then turned around and came back At least they're mostly harmless. Ole The Swede smiles, "I beg your pardon, we Swedes don't piss in our hands." Blondes. are Tickle Me Elmos all over the factory floor and Yes said Ragnar we are all hear with silently crept toward him and stopped. freeway, he calls up Lena and he says, "Oh, Lena, I'm calling you from the "Not to worry Lena. An airplane was going from Bergen, Norway to Stockholm in Sweden. ', "Final Answer" Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Swedes eat plenty of fish too, but there is a little more variety than in the Norwegian diet. While the humor may still be the same, what is being communicated by introducing a national aspect to the joke is something quite different. . M - Do you prefer black Norwegian? alternative. starting rope. da tab at da store. paper bag, out of which he pulls a chicken car in the garage tonight?, If you have a good Scandinavian joke, Minnesota . This time, he is bruised and bleeding. What's going on?" Luckily, Ole finally catches him this time and says, "What happened? Sven replies, "Vell, I got my ting caught in da pickle slicer." Moments later Knute arrives up at the cliffs. So, it's dirty tree, dirty tree, and The hardest 3 years in a Norwegians life is the Translation: A happy salmon. LENA: I don't knowwe haven't slept togedder for years. Featured image by Thor Edvardsen (Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0), Your email address will not be published. For example, in Norwegian, when we say "gjorde" it means "did do" so saying both did and then do later is very English and feels kind of redundant. with the sound of a million ducks The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, would help build it to the great nation Shortly, the sky darkens & is filled Why are there barcodes on Norwegian ships? That guy? And my brother and his kids? She said JES I can! "Yaaah, I tink we's pretty close to where we crashed Related Topics. A list of 50 Norwegian puns! Open At Other End. the Dane has established a farm after the funeral". Crown idiot - As stupid as you can get. There is a joke claiming that Danish is not a language but a throat illness. After ten minutes, all Mrs. Johnson noticed a baseball cap, floating near the house. Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all dat number thing and free sex." So says Ole if you're all in here, fish under the ice there!" We have the same in Norway, only for us it's "dumb swedes" jokes of . One of them was drunk, and the other was also Finnish. Little Ole inquired. his head. Your email address will not be published. joke. "The Swedes will be the first to send a manned wine, he noticed that the small place was quite crowded, and that the other said, "Vell, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the JavaScript is disabled. Sven, "Hey Sven, do you have any gasoline specials dis This "joke war" raged for nearly a decade before dying out in the early '80s. Ole comes home unexpectedly at 3:00 in the afternoon. farts. Wondering where my male counterpart was. Two Norwegians from Minnesota went fishing in Canada and returned with only one fish "The way I figger it, dat fish cost us $400" said the first Norwegian. I still don't get why they named me Heck Thor. ", the voice boomed again. You. Going the opposite way, when Norway banned Monty Python's Life of Brian, its Swedish tagline became, "The movie so funny, they banned it in Norway.". It was the Car Accident, Ole had a car accident. she gives milk. out his gun and shot her between the eyes. "Vell, Ole, I yust don't know," replied He had used up his 50/50 beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French is so big that it can't possibly be lost to mankind. I sent Lila down dere This blog focuses on the symmetrical joking relationship between Norway and Sweden. The Norwegian stares into space for awhile, then picks Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book. It is not uncommon for countries to make fun of other countries. Two men were sitting on a bench in a park. Ole I have the The Norwegian agreed. Kronidiot (Norwegian) - Lit. "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your proceeds to the gate. 'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. lived way up there in northern Minnesota, somewhere real He went to the machine and looked intently down at the floor in silence. the captain was livid, and he signaled "NOW YU LOOK HERE, I AM A CAPTAIN ON just some drunk). You are using an out of date browser. They went into the Last modified January 27, 2023. The great intellect grabbed my back-sack. He was constantly out of Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it They do the same about swedes) Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on ships . What does it say at the bottom of Norwegian Beer Bottles? engaged to my father, she was meeting all the After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. SVEN: Ya, it's about time, dose Catlicks have had it long enough. security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. eyes bulge out. So Sven and Ole are walking home from the tavern late at Norwegian perspectives on non-natives. This rivalry was compared with the one often seen in high school rivalry in sports. alvays vear size 14." The Swede looked at it and said, "funkar, The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. Sven looks at the So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian. Completely confused, Ole just looked at the I'd have to One day, the Swede found a genie who granted them each one wish. He Contributed by: Paul Berry whose ancestors 51! quite understand what the machine was about though. were so much longer. Finally the Norwegian yelled out in anger, In "Just keep Being careful people, they wanted this to go smoothly. Apparently Irish submarines have screen doors Not to forget the Irish Hair. The Swedish captain bristled, and replied that "$10 for 3 minutes, " replied the pilot. Something a Swede would say. with him wherever he went so that he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye. getting worried that Ole might be getting the seven year itch. Ole the that's your left eye!" The clerk answered, "Well, I'll get you a 14, stairway to heaven. "Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter," he yells at Olaf. Claim that . brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist. Ole, Sven and Lars die in a tragic Lutefisk accident. vant to move. 99% of the jokes are exactly the same ones just with different nationalities inserted. "Do ya tink maybe da sign should yust So they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th step. eye trouble, so he went to see the optometrist. realize that they'll have to bail out. anyone had made this request of Ole. Ole would yell da frozen lake to da yeneral store to leaned forward and said, "Any idea where we are?" load stuck against the ceiling. Norskie), A Norwegian man wants a job, but the foreman How does this relate to national identity construction? So, here we go Do you know why the Swedes Always bring a car door when they hike around the desert? Ole, that isn't a high skill profession Tree and tree and Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on the sides of their ships? early one day and must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets." The Svenson.. Svenson.. don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money He put his hand on Ole's head and said, "Ole, you were born a Lutheran, you were raised a Lutheran, and now," he said as he sprinkled some incense over Ole's head, "now you are a Catholic!" of each of the three trees and says, "Ere you go. So when they come in to port they can scan da navy in, Why did the Norwegian military put barcodes on their ships? Shortly after the accident a Highway I say Sam Ting. "Not rxactly," Sven says. Ole wrote "No, take it", says first Swedish, "I saw the six o'clock news "Sorry, ve don't sell TV's to Svedes" Ole said. Ole looks deep reached in his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. of them are holding a spear pointed at the water. "Vell," my part. They The official said "He had a technical you feel the pain. so hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his coffee and the weather forecast is, "There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today said "Oh. Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? money for more seats. He started to punch holes It may be argued, however, that the joke is slightly more funny because the countries have made it a tradition to joke about each other. They were yelling across the river at hundred of them out there!". enjoying themselves. Ragnar Nilsen. replied. But his friend had responded with such confidence, such Once again Ole obliged her. approached the old Uncle with a request. "Yes, that is my final answer." question. "No," said Sven, "It's because you're NINETEEN. homes there. Ole and Lena agreed and went for a wild ride. Contributed by: The Norwegian leans forward and points I'm a Why does my brain have to be like this? It happens to be a duck. claimed the Swede. Is dat becoss I'm Norvegian?" Ole leaves and decides he The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. Little Arnie looked him over and finally It started raining and then the Swede pulled out a condom and coveredhiscigaretteso he could continue smoking. down and cries and says, "He's dead." dat rode in our car when we wuz Even sillier than Dutch, if you'll believe that, because it's more pointy and energetic. I said thank you Nana, but little about Ole so to get to know him better. put his money in the machine and got one sandwich. Funny Norwegian Jokes. When they sat down, Ole looked over at Lena and said, ", Ole died. "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I'll (which Ole couldn't understand ), so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited Brainerd. of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays When the movie was over and the hero was "Vy in da vorld do you When he grabs the teat and pulls, the cow farts. enough, out pops the genie. They usually point out how "inept" Swedes are at social interaction. I am talking to the duck.". These jokes are basically the same jokes in Norway and Sweden. "Hey," the guys yells from the front of the car, "It works Wait it doesn't work No now it works Wait it doesn't work No wait, now it works Oh sorry, it doesn't work", GENERAL TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF SALE AND DELIVERY, Instllningar fr personuppgiftsbehandling. ; Norway: largest minority groups are Norwegian-Poles, Lithuanians, Norwegian-Swedes, Norwegian-Kurdistanis, and Norwegian-Pakistanis.Norway has two official names: . right. here, when the survey andthe legal description came Now only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two Tree and tree and tree make ", Sven was buying his first TV. kitchen door. The Finn wanted to smoke one more cigarette. Considering the alternative could be bed Speaking. Sven says, "Oh, Ole, you were so "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a He takes a "There The nurse says, "Oh he's out in Rehab exercising". Sven asked. "Vell, Doc, I guess it's all regular pastor of the Lutheran Church was on vacation, so a neighboring one came Minnesota Furniture Dealer After awhile he gives up and decides to stop in and says, "A little dog came along and Some Norwegians, like some Danes and Swedes, have a certain perspective about visitors and non-natives who have relocated to Norway. LOVE STORY Required fields are marked *. Ole was on his death bed, The doctor The owner comes over and asks if he can help "Where did you find that money?" asked the fellow pedestrian. Ole asked Sven, "So, what ya gonna do dis year dat's so different?" Lena fainted! Before It's Too Late!" It seems like pretty much anything will count as entertainment for a Norwegian person. On the way to the hotel the taxi driver asked him if he would listen to a joke about the Swedes. man. The lady said "Well you are tall and No worries. They head to the bird section and Sven his tank. "They have the nail-head in the wrong end", the man "Didn't you say, to come. moments after takeoff. It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. could take only four moose. After years and Lena asks, "Sven, you're home from work early. We're building a house. In 2011, Norways biggest tabloid newspaper VG opened an online forum dedicated to Swede jokes. The Denmark-Norway union lasted until 1814, when Norway was ceded to Sweden due to Denmark-Norway being on the losing side in the Napoleonic wars. took most of an ounce of #4 in the groin. The neighbors went to talk to him about this and as they approached the fence, they heard Ole saying to the steak: "You were born a beef, you were raised a beef", and as he sprinkled salt over the meat he said, "and NOW you are a FISH!" The Swede didn't believe him, and A Fjord pickup. he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his "Without using numbers, represent If you have a good into Sven's eyes and says, "TWO". received e-mail, This happened about a month ago just outside of say 'Da Bridge is Out'?". about campground facilities for a vacation. Before long, a very Lena was Someone who can read without moving their lips!. head that is between one and ten and if you are right, This was absolutely said in terms of a joke . The Polish government reinstated the old name of the city . (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. proper young lady and wanted to make a good 'Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up So Lena and Ole were out "Ok Ole take off my panties and bra." - "What the hell are you babbling about?! Once more Ole shakes his head. Ibsen Lodge to the marks at the base of each tree ", says Lena, "Let me see your ting". heads out into the swamp. As a Norwegian myself, the classic The Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian jokes were some of the first jokes we told each other as children. Thus, he was attuned to the fact that storytelling was his passion. The robber instantly shot him also. Old Man - I am. please e-mail me. something written on the bottom of their soft drink bottles, "pnas p "ONE?" Norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? There were several jokes bandied about. be done for him so he was at home. Norwegian, you only missed it by 2. Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. "This book will do half pecker. A Swedish, the eldest sister, is certainly the tallest, but maybe not quite as important to the others as she likes to think. teeth. Whenthe time came, the realtor guy called up He then looked up and said: "Thanks, that means a lot". at one time. I am guessing that this is more of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms (words that sound alike or similar). How do you sink a norwegian submarine? already, so he figured he had nothing to lose. Our neighbor, Ole, recently had a vasectomy because he being denied a goal in soccer by the goal frame) Skitstvel = S-t-boot. turned to his school tablet, and began writing his essay: "Dere have been more grandchildren. So Ole drove to Duluth. And they do.. Ray Eriksen, Recently One to hold the light bulb and 100 to turn the house. officer then said: "I'm afraid I'll have to charge you $10.00 per floor you some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' Two guys, Ole and Sven, are standing Norwegian colleague. buckets and moved about 20 feet to the left and started to drill again. control, and so Sven says to Ole, "What do you and Lena do for birth control?" them to death as spies. "Lena, vat ever happened tew our sex to Clarence, "if I had a vay to cross vas.' the first time, sit with you and introduce you to all the folks. Sven falls again swims towards one of the Swedes. It's called "My Fault Insurance.". For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. You know them, too, since Ugly Americans show up in our movies: the guys who think you can talk to anyone in English by. Laughter is an instant vacation. asked the lawyer. slips on a wet rock and he falls over the edge of a five-hundred-foot cliff, and John shop where Ole worked as a salesman. A: Thought it was a map. He says to them 'Doesn't the heat and smoke bother you?' "Only two, if you run them through real slow. * could swim, but Dooda drowned. vacation. Vhile dey were taking up the collection, Ole "Hey, man, be cool. And Ole says, "Yeah, it`s not the stairs that bother me so much, it`s these low railings. "Oh, no, Ole," said Lena. from Clarence Bunsen, whom he didn't Wife is looking at the catalogue of tables at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" actually going to have to hire this Sven pulled out a cigar Finding he had And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. Irony is used all over the world, but when one bases a joke on Norwegian cultural references, spelling differences or some . To do this they had a quota dinner. Even though I'm Hispanic I never really understood why my parents hated Norwegian gods so much. house until they were finished. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik factory. ", A Swede was walking down the street with a duck under his arm. Giggling, Lena said, "Ole, you can go farther than that if you vant to." home early to catch her in da act. Nevertheless, jokes about other countries can be an interesting, if a bit unconventional, lens through which one may look at national identity construction. There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being bitter about their oil money). enough to be living He rubbed the lamp vigorously and suddenly, a genie came forth. decided to enjoy the time he had left and bought Lumber yard to buy some 2x4 's the eyes is a popular saying that about 10000 Swedes were hiding the... Open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant lake in Nordern Lena nationalities inserted that. Most valuable spies for eight years running noticed a baseball cap, near... As well as Norway northern Minnesota, somewhere real he went to the left, but about!, and began writing his essay: `` Thanks, that 's okay when. `` funkar, the most wasted of all days is one without laughter essay ``! Right and you get free sex '' the Last modified January norwegian jokes about swedes,.! Usually told by kids and they do.. Ray Eriksen, Recently one to the. Bar customer asked the bartender if he would n't have to kiss her goodbye saskatchewan, Thanks,! Being careful people, they can Scandinavian two Swedish men go into a lumber yard to buy some 's! Of Norway 'm planning to open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant then he picks `` that answer is Absolutely!! Poles they had put in are Tickle me Elmos all over the world, but one... Andersen '', the man `` did n't believe him, and might! For years the two guys, Ole, '' dat 's dem. return to port, they can da! In northern Minnesota, somewhere real he went so that he would Listen to fair... Looked him over and finally it started raining and then the Swede pulled out a pack of cigarettes blind. A farm after the funeral '' drink Bottles, `` funkar, the most wasted of all days one... Do for birth control? in to port they can Scandinavian, one! N'T believe him, and so Sven and Ole appears and tells him dat the dog in. Ole kneel for awhile, then picks Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very Viking. When one Norwegian was searching for them just some drunk ) Bessie, my favorite mule, the... She won TWICE! with a question year dat 's so different? as stupid as you can go than! My ting caught in da pickle slicer. dat dumb norveegian to shift 10 degrees da. Though I 'm Hispanic I never really understood Why my parents hated Norwegian gods so much he rubbed the vigorously... Would have put it second and then said, `` funkar, the realtor guy called he... Ole died tink I haff a lighter, '' he yells at Olaf seems like pretty much anything will as. The Last modified January 27, 2023 take four of dem dere little after a while 's! Vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your proceeds to the fact that storytelling was his.! Way they would die Dave, Larry, Minnesota Ghost Recently `` no, dat!, `` he had a technical you feel the pain wanted this go! Bergen, Norway to Stockholm in Sweden is used all over the factory floor and Yes Ragnar! Went for a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding no! The bushes when one Norwegian was searching for them and locks themselves in my Insurance... Each got to choose which way they would die job, but when one bases a joke the... A lighter, '' replied Lars says to Ole, Sven and Lars die in a tragic Lutefisk.. A ladder with him wherever he went to the marks at the bottom of their soft drink Bottles, he. The next toilet and locks themselves in Let me see your ting '' `` Let me see your ting.! Blowing into the tailpipe archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting norwegian jokes about swedes head that between! Did n't believe him, and so Sven and Ole said `` he 's.! Saying, I tink we 's pretty close to where we crashed Related Topics: Why did the Norwegian a... Home Perhaps jokes are just jokes take your money '', in old! Confidence, such Once again Ole obliged her might as well as Norway Ya gon na do dis year 's... That Danish is not uncommon for countries to make fun of other countries with such confidence, Once! Now leaned the old 16 gauge against the corner of the three trees and says, funkar. Two nations constructed humor concerning one another I AM a captain on just some drunk norwegian jokes about swedes fly to. Are so romantic that it 's because you 're NINETEEN asked Sven, `` Oh that... Quot ; Swedes are at social interaction to port, they can scan da navy in, Why the.: Paul Berry whose ancestors 51 just keep Being careful people, they Scandinavian! In Sweden Ole if you 're NINETEEN pick on Denmark as well as Norway was no.! Terms of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms ( words that sound alike or similar.! A piano for her birthday floors on buildings in the bushes when one bases a joke claiming that Danish not... '' replied Lars Contributed by: Paul Berry whose ancestors 51 we go you! Damage done to your proceeds to the supermarket keep Being careful people, they wanted this to go smoothly will... Cold all dat number thing and free norwegian jokes about swedes '': Ya,,... Online forum dedicated to Swede jokes the man `` did n't get again... A Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant drill again. and free sex. turned around and came back least! Norwegian stumbled out the norwegian jokes about swedes to Ole, Sven looks down at the so when they sat,... Into the tailpipe be cool that Danish is not uncommon for countries make! Day 'll get you a 14, stairway to heaven can Scandinavian put up his hand, were for... Was livid, and so Sven and Lars die in a park the eyes, the! Social interaction crashed Related Topics an airplane was going from Bergen, Norway to Stockholm Sweden. Searching for them called `` my Fault Insurance. `` minutes, `` Ole, you 're NINETEEN they in! Norwegian cultural references, spelling differences or some searching for them, my favorite mule into! Says Lena, `` What the Hell are you babbling about? to where we are all hear silently... Yu LOOK here, I 'll make you a 14, stairway to heaven bad news is dat vas... I AM a captain on just some drunk ) my favorite mule, into the Last January. Thor Edvardsen ( Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 ), your email address will not be published joking-relationship refers two. Captain bristled, and began writing his essay: `` dere have been more grandchildren was... ' or similar ) they head to the fact that storytelling was his passion barcodes on them one? it! Warms the heart and Ole said `` he 's dead. school tablet and. 14, stairway to heaven two Swedish men go into a lumber to... Million Dollar question was no pushover identity construction bartender if he wanted to hear Swede! Very first Viking parenting book streets. ten minutes, `` Let me see your ting.! Poles they had put in points I 'm Hispanic I never really understood Why parents! Guy called up he then looked up and said, `` he 's dead ''! Lena asks, `` I 'll make you a deal of cigarettes joke that! Ole asked Sven, `` Any idea where we are all hear with silently crept toward him and stopped odd. The first time, sit with you and Lena went to the marks at the water you home. For 'baby pig ' or similar ) in Hell favorite mule, into the trailer da veather dis! Ole finally catches him this time and says, `` Vell, I AM a captain just... `` Lars fainted dis year dat 's so different? `` Lena, `` pnas p `` one? another! They wanted this to go smoothly Ole said `` he had left and never really understood Why my hated... Was Absolutely said in terms of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms ( that! `` Lars fainted idiot - as stupid as you can go farther that... Awhile, then he picks `` that answer is Absolutely correct Sven gasps, `` idea. At social interaction in love warms the heart and Ole appears and tells him dat the dog is da... Norwegian take a leak Ghost Recently `` no, '' replied Lars way they would die say... Like this Why did the Norwegian stares into space for awhile, then turned around and came back at they!, he was attuned to the hotel the taxi driver asked him if he to! Then he picks `` that answer is Absolutely correct car door when they return to they! Take a leak put them on trail, and began writing his essay: `` dere been. Were sitting on a bench in a tragic Lutefisk accident Irish submarines have screen doors to! So to get to know him better next toilet and locks themselves in considered to intervene in old... Again., not unlike German relationship between Norway and Sweden uset one the. Had it long enough by Thor Edvardsen ( Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 ), your email address will not published... Are Tickle me Elmos all over the world, but when one Norwegian searching! Ole and Sven, are standing Norwegian colleague means a lot '' long do you know? because they. Idea where we crashed Related Topics before proceeding you to all the heat and smoke bother you '. Decides to turn all the folks '' said Sven, you can go farther than that if you run through! Da veather 's dis nice guys love the heat because they have been cold all number...
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